Help me sleep please

Dear Internets -

I need some help. My adorable little boy who has been a great sleeper since we did CIO at 8 months doesn't sleep any more. I'm exhausted. My husband's exhausted. And we don't know what to do.

Here's the situation. For the last 2 weeks (or so), Spencer goes to bed at his normal bed time (between 7 and 8) and falls asleep pretty easily. All is well until he wakes up around midnight. At that point, he is inconsolable. He sits in his crib crying and screaming. The only thing that will make him stop crying is to come out and be with us. He's immediately fine once he gets in our arms. After hanging out with us for a bit (usually sitting together on the couch reading books), he goes back to sleep in his crib without a struggle. Last night we let him cry for over an hour and a half, not wanting to encourage the behavior, but we finally relented and got him out - I really think he would have cried ALL night.

Things I can rule out:
- teething - no new chompers in sight
- fear of the dark - got him a night light last week just in case

I suspect some sort of an attachment issue. Which makes even more sense if you saw the way he clings to my legs 24 hours a day (or at least those hours we're together).  Is there anything I can do to help him feel more secure?  I only have two ideas and neither is very appealing - either sleep on the floor beside his crib or bring him into bed with us (last time I tried this I ended up with a fat lip). For the love of sleep, please tell me you have some other ideas for us...

Comments

[Amy]

It could be something from the supposed, dreaded, 18 month sleep regression. For which I think the only cure is time and temporary loss of sanity. See ask moxie, one of my favorite gurus:
http://moxie.blogs.com/askmoxie/2006/04/qa_18month_slee.html
I hope the link works. If not, just search her site for 18 month sleep regression.

The other thing that comes to mind is night terrors. My Mom says I had these and that I always woke in the night screaming until I had a bed until a crib. I think I read they develop at about 1.5 years old. My folks learned about my problem with them randomly b/c they moved and didn't assemble the crib ASAP and had me on the floor on a mattress. They woke in the night and thought I died for not waking up - but lo and behold, I just was happy not to be in a crib anymore.
(Though I know I've seen a picture of Spence in a bed, not a crib... so this story may be for naught)

Good luck Tracy. I hope these ideas help.

[Amy]

Sorry about the typos in my post. I think you get the idea though.

[Sheri]

yeah, we've got a bit of this going on here too. it's resistance to going down AND night wakings, wanting to be held. leo hasn't EVER wanted to sleep with us (sob!) but all the sudden will fall back asleep ON ME, huggin me. i think it is the dreaded 18m separation anxiety thing, though i haven't read a parenting book in several years. i have no answers. it will end though. it most likely will feel like forever until it does. does milk help? sometimes milk helps, and i don't care if it's getting him into some sort of bad routine. we do it sometimes. in the name of sleep, we do anything!

[Abby]

Easier said than done, but I'd do everything possible to keep him in his room, even if you go in there to comfort him; that way, he doesn't start thinking that crying = a way out of bed/hanging out with mom & dad in the living-room.

(of course, by going in to comfort him, you risk him thinking that crying = hanging out with mom/dad in his room, but at least that's somewhat easier to transition into "bedtime = stay in your bedroom.")

My friend A is currently dealing with the same thing with her almost-2-year-old, and she's going nuts. Her pediatrician said "lock the door from the outside" but she can't bring herself to do it. I honestly don't know. There is a no-cry sleep solution (or something similar) that says you wait longer & longer periods before going in & comforting them - (10, 15, 20 minutes) - maybe try that?